Thursday, April 14, 2011

Saying "YES" is easy, saying "NO" is a harder skill...

"No" is so often hard to say.. because mostly, people on the receiving end tend to take a "NO" for an answer in a disrespectful, disappointing way.. and the person saying the "NO", more often than not, is concerned with the fear of having alienated the person on the receiving end and jeopardising the relationship.
But one should not err in prioritising... There is no reason to comply with the wishes or requests of someone who is undeserving of it all!
It is great to help others and not leave them in the lurch, but only if they are worthy of it.
Considering the needs of others is important but only if they are deserving of it...

Saying "Yes" to people who didn’t respect my time or took me for granted or were just taking advantage of me, by complying with their requests, I was actually, in a way, being unfair to myself ...
Then I realised that every time I said YES to something, I was actually saying NO to something else (and that "something else" might have been more important and more rightly deserved my attention). But now, I have learnt a very good lesson that "to be able to say YES to the rightly important things/people, I have to say NO to a lot of other unimportant things/people". More importantly, I have now learnt the skill of correctly prioritising the right things and the right people in my life...
I still firmly believe that "in LIFE, the letter 'I' comes second..."
but now I have added a special clause to it -- I will come second but "only for those who are deemed worthy of it".. and never for the undeserving ones ever again.

One shouldn't be tempted to say a YES to someone's request, if he isn't genuinely satisfied for having said so...
Keeping it simple... One should say YES only where he/she feels he/she genuinely can/should
or else should say an honest NO... :-)
“A 'NO' uttered from deepest conviction is better and greater than a 'YES' merely uttered to please, or what is worse, to avoid trouble.” ~~ Mahatma Gandhi 

I have now understood that saying NO is okay .. I might disappoint the one on the receiving end but I have to be clear and honest in my answer... and I should say it sincerely. If the person on the receiving end is open-minded, he/she will understand the genuine reasons for the NO and will gracefully accept it.
I have now learnt how to say a respectful, decisive NO.... and saying it effectively...

Whether to say YES or to say NO?? The question might seem to be tricky... but the key to its answer (becomes simpler and) lies in GETTING THE PRIORITIES RIGHT.

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